At the biggest crossroad of my life

He has cheated, he tried to get sex from other women...they denied him but he still tried and tried hard. He tried so hard he is banned from a Walmart store because he sexual harassed a girl until she couldn't handle it anymore.
Now what...
I told him I don't know if I can stay with him, but in the same 24 hours I said that and then slept with him. I am so unbelievably confused and I am confusing him and I don't know what to do.
I feel like I should be hurting so much more than I am, I feel like I should not even be remotely considering staying here. What is wrong with me that I can allow him to cheat, allow him to lie to my face for months and still stay here with him. What kind of woman does this.
I don't know how to leave, I don't even know the first step. I don't know how to do this. I have no job, I am making barely anything on EI and I don't have a way. Staying is the best option isn't it.
Forever I am going to be scarred and scared and hurt and I don't know how to trust him again. He keeps doing things to hurt me and each time they are worse, he has hurt me more than any person ever has. I am starting to feel indifferent as to if I am with him or not and that tells me that this relationship is not good for me.
He has profused his love many many times over the past few days, he has cried at my feet, he has begged me to stay, he has begged me to let him stay. He says he knows this is going to take time, but I don't know how much time, it could be forever. He swears this will never happen again, he promises that he will never hurt me again, he swears he will change. But, people don't change unless they really want to for themselves and he doesn't want to for himself...he only wants to so he is not alone.
I am so stressed and all I want to do is sleep because only then do all the stupid emotions and worries fade away. I don't want to be in this situation.
I look to my left and I see me alone with the kids struggling but fighting hard to make a life for me and them. I don't know if I am smiling in this scene. I don't know how to have a job in this light, i don't know how to survive really, but I do know that if I have to I will do everything I can to make it work. I don't know if there is love in this world either, love from another. Do I want to be in a relationship with someone else.
On the right, I stay, life continues as it always has and David is here with his kids even if it is only in a context that has a playstation attached. I don't know if in this world I am happy, I don't know if I have a relationship with trust...essentially I don't know if it has love. I don't know if this reality will open the door for me to be hurt again. Will he do it again.....I am almost positive he will.
I don't know if we are meant for each other anymore. Here come the tears again.
I am so pissed off that he has done this, put me here. I hate him for putting me here.